How small are God's hands???

Hello old friends,
I am sorry that I have been away from my blogging of late but my attitude is not what I think that it should be and thus have a hard time blogging.

Since I have been here it has been the goal of the people who are helping me and working with me to take away from me everything that I depend on , until I have nothing left but God.

I don't have a boyfriend or any prospects nor can I seek out such as a condition of my help.
I don't have any kids here nor am I allowed to work with any here.
I don't have anywhere to serve, no meals to fix, class to teach, or piano to play.
I don't have my church family who has been a great help to me in everything.
I don't have any friends here.
I have basically no responsibilities here.

I have began to hate living here, yes I want to depend more on God. But I want to have kids around me, I want a man, I want to be useful, I want to be needed.

My entire life I have had kids around me to take care of, teach and love.
I grew up in a daycare, I have had kids to care for all the time for a long time. My cousin, my kids, my nephews.
I have always had kids. I love to have kids around me. I love kids.
I love to come home to screaming, laughing, rambunctious , messy kids.

I hate coming home to nobody, I hate living in a house with people that I don't ever see, I hate being alone.

I know that God is big enough to do big things, but I have a hard time knowing that God can do small things too. I have a hard time knowing that God is small enough to know my pain and cares.
His hands are big enough to make the world, and part the sea. But are His hands small enough to hold me? To get me through one more day of this life that I must somehow learn to live?
How small is God? Is He small enough to be all the people that I don't have in my life? Is He small enough to comfort my tears in the night? Is He small enough to care that I am falling apart inside?
Again and again I struggle with the question of : Is God enough ?

I know that He has promised to never leave me, He has promised over and again that He will go with me
But, somehow I think that I want someone else along for the journey.( or a whole pile of somebodies)
I don't want to walk this way alone.

Pray for me as I try to figure all these things out for me.

Karen

P.S.
Yes , I know that I stole some of the blog idea from "Bring the Rain". but it was a touching post from her and I wanted to share with you what I have been thinking on.
All credit where it is due.